(via bioticarmitage)

[Submitted by: iseulttoinjury
Personnel should stop making blatant sexual references in an attempt to fluster Captain America. People were, in fact, having sex in the 1940s, and Capt. Rogers was in the Army. It will not work. As of now, he has permission to retaliate, and any “mental scarring” will be considered deserved.]
[Submitted by: thezancasaurus
“Because Captain Rogers didn’t get the reference” is NOT a valid reason to have movie marathons during work hours.]
[Submitted by: iseulttoinjury
S.H.I.E.L.D. personnel are reminded that, regardless of their personal tastes, neither Justin Bieber, nor Rebecca Black are considered “the most illustrious bards of this age,” and it is now a punishable offense to instruct those not familiar with modern Earth that this is the case.]
[Submitted by: kitfoxhawaii
It should be noted by ALL PERSONNEL that any release of snakes on S.H.I.E.L.D. aircraft, specifically for the purpose of provoking me into saying a line from some film, will not be tolerated. Release of any animal, be they domestic or wild, on any S.H.I.E.L.D. property is an express violation of rule CF14-9 section 2, and will not cause me to recite some ludicrous catchphrase.
However, it may cause me to put my muthafucking boot up your muthafucking behind.]
(via historykraken)
[Submitted by: notanightlight
Misters Stark and Banner are reminded that although we have allowed them personal use of one of the helicarrier labs, this does not make it their “Super Secret Fort of Science.” It is not improved by pillow structures. Your IQ does not have to be over 140 points to enter. And it has no secret password.
Aside from the S.H.I.E.L.D. issued one.]
(via lord-kitschener)
- Bruce: Hey!
- Natasha: Why were you talking to Phil Coulson?
- Bruce: I don't know, he's so weird, he just, you know, came up to me and starting talking to me about the Avengers.
- Natasha: he’s so pathetic. Let me tell you something about Phil Coulson. We were best friends in middle school. I know, right? It’s so embarrassing. I don’t even… Whatever. So then in eighth grade, I started going out with my first boyfriend Clint who was totally gorgeous but then he moved back to Budapest. , and Phil was like, weirdly jealous of him. Like, if I would blow him off to hang out with Clint, he’d be like, “Why didn’t you call me back?” And I’d be like, “Why are you so obsessed with me?” So then, for my birthday party, which was a Captain America dedication pool party, I was like, “Phil, I can’t invite you, because I think you’re obsessed with Captain America.” I mean I couldn’t have him there at my party. Captain America was gonna be there in a *bathing suit*. I mean, right? he was obsessed. So then his mom called my mom and started yelling at her, it was so retarded. And then he dropped out of school because no one would talk to him, and he came back in the fall for high school, and he was a S.H.I.E.L.D agent. he was totally weird, and now I guess he’s hiring Avengers!
- president snow: LET'S GET DOWN TO BUSINESS
- peeta: TO BAKE SOME BUNS
- haymitch: DID THEY SEND ME TRIBUTES WHEN I ASKED FOR RUM?
- effie: you're the saddest bunch i ever met but you can bet, before we're through
- haymitch: THAT I'LL
- MAKE A VICTOR
- OUT OF YOOOUUUU
- effie, octavia, portia and flavius: stylish as the capitol-
- cinna: BUT ON FIRE WITHIN
- haymitch: once you earn your sponsors, you'll be SURE TO WIN
- effie: you are a spineless
- octavia and portia: PALE
- flavius: and pathetic lot
- haymitch: aND YOU HAVEN'T GOT A CLUEEEE
- SOMEHOW I'LL
- MAKE A VICTOR OUT OF YOOUUUU
- katniss: um
- Gale: You're on the phone with your baker he's upset
- Katniss: oh no
- Gale: Goin' off about some cake that he burnt
- Gale: 'cause he doesn't know how to hunt like I do
- Katniss: Gale stop
- Gale: I'm in the woods it's a typical Sunday afternoon
- Gale: I'm hunting the kind of squirrels he doesn't like
- Gale: He'll never be able to hunt like I do
- Gale: CUZ HE BAKES BREAD
- Gale: I MAKE SNARES
- Gale: HE EATS CUPCAKES
- Gale: AND I HUNT BEARS
- Katniss: Gale just stop

![memosfromfury:
[Submitted by: iseulttoinjury
Personnel should stop making blatant sexual references in an attempt to fluster Captain America. People were, in fact, having sex in the 1940s, and Capt. Rogers was in the Army. It will not work. As of now, he has permission to retaliate, and any “mental scarring” will be considered deserved.]](http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m808mq2z4v1r45jjpo1_500.jpg)
![memosfromfury:
[Submitted by: thezancasaurus
“Because Captain Rogers didn’t get the reference” is NOT a valid reason to have movie marathons during work hours.]](http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m7sz7dgyD11r45jjpo1_500.jpg)
![memosfromfury:
[Submitted by: iseulttoinjury
S.H.I.E.L.D. personnel are reminded that, regardless of their personal tastes, neither Justin Bieber, nor Rebecca Black are considered “the most illustrious bards of this age,” and it is now a punishable offense to instruct those not familiar with modern Earth that this is the case.]](http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m7n1erZTjX1r45jjpo1_500.jpg)

![memosfromfury:
[Submitted by: kitfoxhawaii
It should be noted by ALL PERSONNEL that any release of snakes on S.H.I.E.L.D. aircraft, specifically for the purpose of provoking me into saying a line from some film, will not be tolerated. Release of any animal, be they domestic or wild, on any S.H.I.E.L.D. property is an express violation of rule CF14-9 section 2, and will not cause me to recite some ludicrous catchphrase.
However, it may cause me to put my muthafucking boot up your muthafucking behind.]](http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lvnlxjJMlF1r45jjpo1_500.jpg)
![memosfromfury:
[Submitted by: notanightlight
Misters Stark and Banner are reminded that although we have allowed them personal use of one of the helicarrier labs, this does not make it their “Super Secret Fort of Science.” It is not improved by pillow structures. Your IQ does not have to be over 140 points to enter. And it has no secret password.
Aside from the S.H.I.E.L.D. issued one.]](http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4ru9z378C1r45jjpo1_500.jpg)





